
Sandra asks…
Lesbian relationship advice?
Ok here is the story me and my fiancé (currently ex as of a couple days ago) have been together for almost two years she broke up with me a day before our two year anniversary. We met online, I lived in California at the time cause of my job and she live in a different state. We talked so much online and on the phone we fell in love with each other before we even met in person. I know it sounds a little weird almost like a fairy tale, but it was awesome things couldn’t have been better. So basically after four or five months of us talking she decides to come out to California and visit me for a couple days. It was amazing we fell deeper in love with each other. A month or so after that I took a flight to go see her, I visited for a little over a week. Things were still going great between us we had so much in common. I met her family and they liked me. She has not met my family yet, because I have not came out to my family as being in a relationship with another woman. So anyways I go back to Cali and we continue to talk and we decide that she should move out there and we can get a place together. Still everything is great.
We have talked about each others past and she told me about her ex and told me that she had a bad relationship with her ex and being abused.
She told me that she was never in love with her ex, but she was only with her because of her ex’s two little kids. They are not theirs together her ex had one before her and when they got together she was pregnant with the second. He ex always throws in her face that she is never to see the kids anymore, she does that anytime they disagree on things.
My ex feels that she has a attachment to these kids and her ex knows that and knows she can get to her by using the kids and she always never wanted us together. They say they are just friends now. But I told her that if we are going to make it you need to live your ex and the kids out of our relationship so we can get on with our lives and start our own family.
So back to where I was….We ended up moving back to where she was from and where I lived before going to Cali. We stayed at her moms for awhile and then got our own place.
We have been getting into a lot of arguments since we moved back to where she is from, most of the time we got over them. She works full time and I go to school full time, that was the arrangement and in January along with schooling I was going back to work. Everything was fine with that. So within the last few months of our relationship it has been slowly declining she even said she fell out of love with me. I am still madly in love with her, and as of a few weeks ago she said she is in love with me and see us having a future. But about a week ago I found out she has been texting her ex off her work cell, she said she only does that to talk with the two little kids, when the kids aren’t even old enough to know how to text..hmm??? Her ex always try to start fights with me, her ex went as far as posting a blog about how my ex and her had sex in the bathroom while me and her were together. She said this was false, I believed her, my ex said that she was just trying to piss me off.
She said she has to get to her to talk with the kids. She even went as far as wanting to have weekend visitation with the two little kids at the place we shared. I disagreed because I know how her ex is and she just wants her back in her life, but yet she is so unpredictable that she will through it in my ex’s face once she starts seeing the kids that nope, it’s not going to happen anymore. She says I am the only one for her and no one could ever take my place and she is not going to be with anyone else.
I am confused; I would like as much advice as people can offer
Do I still try and be with her?
Is she right?
Should she still be friends with the ex and her kids?

Lukes Love Life answers:
I’m sincerely considering that your girl believes she is somewhat of a mother figure to these two kids. She loves them and as so, you can never compete against a mother’s love. You must accept this, or not, and move on. Can you find a compromise? Perhaps, but it will mostly on your part. Make a list of the pros and cons of this relationship…which side is longer? And don’t think sex is the only answer. What else do you have in common with this girl? You need ethics, morals, hobbies and communication for a long term relationship. I know, I’ve been handfasted to the same woman for 28 years. Do you love kids? Can you? I have tried to put myself in your shoes….for I do not like kids and if my belovedness had children I can almost guarantee you we would not still be together. It is a hard choice you have to make…but do do and do not “kid” yourself, be honest with your feelings…for you, her and the kids. Just my thoughts.

Thomas asks…
Blog spot Advice name?
Ok So I been told I give good advice, with Teen stuff, relationship, Family, Friends, and other things.
I do love to help others and I been ask to make a Blog or Website and help those who need help. I need a name, I try to think of one but can’t.
Please help me(:

Lukes Love Life answers:
You could try to associate your real name with the name of your blog/site.
Example: “Helpful Hailey”, or “Care’in Sharon” , or like “Answering Andrea”
lol that would be a cool idea, but I don’t know your real name so I couldn’t think of anything that would rhythm with your name.

Ken asks…
Why is modern day relationship advice so lovely?
http://uk.lifestyle.yahoo.com/love-sex/10-excuses-for-dumping-someone-blog-32-dan-juan.html

Lukes Love Life answers:
That guy is a moron. I’d imagine the only place he has dating adventures or the opportunity to dump someone is in his fantasy world.
It’s interesting how it’s titled “10 Excuses for Dumping Someone” but the language is geared towards men dumping women.

Ruth asks…
relationship advice 10 points?
I been talking to this guy i met online for abt 5 months..we met in person only one time..and he claim we’re in a relationship. but im confused everytime i want to spend time with him he have an excuse..but before i met him in person i searched him online and i came across a blog a girl he was dating wrote..she mentioned him in the blog..she was saying they went out 3 times and he bought her a build a bear..to make a long story short..i was joking with him today online and showed him a bracelet i was looking at and i said “yeah my boyfriend is gonna buy me this”and he was like” yeah right you wish” but to mind you all in the blog the girl wrote they went out and he bought her stuff..even though this was before he met me..should i get mad over it? i dont know its like i dont really have feelings for him anymore because he never want to spend time together..
**p.s- i also found the girl’s myspace profile should i send her a msg and try to get information abt him..

Lukes Love Life answers:
Definitely nothing to get all mad about!! Maybe he doesn’t see you that way or maybe like a play “wifey” because if he really wanted you he’d take you out at least a few times… Don’t get all worked up over one guy, ON TO THE NEXT ONE!

Donna asks…
I need some relationship advice from guys and/or girls…?
There’s a guy I really like and he knows I like him. Apparently he also really likes me too as he has told some of our mutual best friends. There a few problems though…
1- We are both shy and so find it hard to speak about liking each other to the others face. Basically I haven’t told him and he hasn’t told me but we have each told our friends.
2- He is very good friends with a girl and has been for many years. I didn’t feel thretend by this at all at first as he always refers to her as his friend as says how they have been friends literally for ever but recently I have noticed more on his blog that he says how much he loves her and he has comments from his friends saying things like ‘Guys just wake up and see what we all do’ or ‘Seriously you two, stop kidding yourselves’ and its making me think is there any point
3- He told my friend that although he does like me hes not sure if he wants a relationship.
I really like this guy and would like to know what you all think. How do I get the courage to speak to him and how do I make him tell me? What do you think about his relationship with his ‘friend’? Is there any point in me trying to take this further? And how do I try and make him see that he wants to be with me?
A lot of questions I know (sorry guys Im so confused) but I would really appreciate any help on this. It would be good to hear from both girls and guys too to see what you all think. Thanks loads guys x

Lukes Love Life answers:
When a girl likes a guy, it is difficult for her to accept the truth, she is inclined to “see what she wants to see and ignore the truth.” I think you are rejecting the truth and making excuses for him. You need to look at the facts hon; face up to reality. If I were in your place, I would consider the (girl) friend to be his girl friend. Even tho their friendship is not sexual, still she is very important and I myself would not tolerate him having a (girl) friend. I would throw down an ultimatum… It’s me or her hon, which one of us is it gonna be? Make up your mind and let me know. And if he chose her, then so be it; get on with your life.
Powered by Yahoo! Answers

