Mandy asks…
Guys in their 20s asking out an older woman…advice please?
I’m a single woman in her mid 40s and without children. I had spent a long time with one guy and we broke up a couple of years ago. As luck has it, I look a lot younger than my years and am frequently taken as a 30 year old. I also take good care of myself by keeping fit and eating very well. Because of this I am often asked out by guys in their twenties. The problem is, I am often attracted to them too. You might say ‘what problem’? Ok, true, if an attraction is mutual why not go for it but in reality, I feel a bit insecure about the level of maturity of these guys and usually turn them down. I am not really attracted to men in my age group so I feel frustrated at this situation. I want to date a guy who is able to have a stable long term relationship with me. I fear that these 20 somethings are just looking for a fling or sexual experience with an older woman. Can these relationships really work..like real love? Or will the want a young girl for a baby etc?
Lukes Love Life answers:
Yes they can definately work! As long as you both love each other than the age doesn’t matter. Just make sure you’re not controlling or too clingy because that’s not what a young man wants in a woman!
William asks…
Older woman asked out by guys in their 20s…advice please?
I’m a woman in her mid 40s who is single and without children. I had spent a long time with one guy and we broke up a couple of years ago. As luck has it, I look a lot younger than my years and am frequently taken as a 30 year old. I also take good care of myself by keeping fit and eating very well. Because of this I am often asked out by guys in their twenties. The problem is, I am often attracted to them too. You might say ‘what problem’? Ok, true, if an attraction is mutual why not go for it but in reality, I feel a bit insecure about the level of maturity of these guys and usually turn them down. I am not really attracted to men in my age group so I feel frustrated at this situation. I want to date a guy who is able to have a stable long term relationship with me. I fear that these 20 somethings are just looking for a fling or sexual experience with an older woman. Can these relationships really work..like real love? Or will the want a young girl for a baby etc?
Lukes Love Life answers:
You’re perhaps not being fair to yourself or to the men who are asking you out because you’re turning them down without giving them a chance. Not all men in their 20s are immature, the same as not all men in their 40s are mature. Treat people as individuals not as an age group and they may reciprocate.
Susan asks…
what do men look for in a relationship?
if you could give me some advice, I would like to know, what do adult guys (in their 20s only) look for in a relationship? what do they think of women in general? im a woman whose never dated or been in a relationship. im hoping to get started soon before i get older and will have missed out on experiencing it while im still somewhat young. what do i have to do to find someone?
Lukes Love Life answers:
It will not solve your problem. Everyone is unique hence have different thinking and ideas about a relationship. Most guy want a girl who is simple, not too fashionable and support his ideas and romance .
Otherwise some guys are looking for small term relation and some other activities that I guess you know.
Everyone want little romance and that is must. Otherwise everyone is unique.
Sandy asks…
Guys in your 20s? Advice please? Could this guy really fall for me?
I’m a 48 year old single woman without childen. Luckily I am taken for 33 or so as I take care, don’t smoke and drink very little (I’ve a sexy body & am pretty). I’ve had 2 serious relationships, the last of which ended 7 years ago. He was 14 years younger, we had a good relationship but I was a workaholic & he wasn’t able to commit. Since then I’ve dated many guys, often just one date, not even a kiss as I’m usually not attracted to many guys. Here’s the problem, I’m very very attracted to guys in their mid 20s and they often go for me. I’m a good honest woman who wants love but I’m tortured by this attraction to guys young enough to be my sons. Now I’ve been chatting to a guy on facebook yor a year. We’ve also called by cam. He’s 24, v intelligent and wants a serious relationship. He doesn’t want kids. We talk about everything. He lives in another city but wants to meet. There’s an attraction., he’s told me he would kiss me if he met me & he’d like to live with me. Do you think he could really fall for me?
Lukes Love Life answers:
Yea for sure. He easily could. However be careful, do not seek out a long future with him. You may be a hottie at 48 but what happens when you turn 55 and your looks are gone and he is 31 and still good looking? If its the real thing then great, but don’t dive in right away. I see lots of red flags here.
Helen asks…
Calling guys in your mid 20s..dating a woman who is much older? Advice please.
I am a woman in her mid 40s. Luckily I am often taken for 32, as I stay fit and don’t smoke or drink. I’ve never married or had children as I’ve had a pretty busy working life up until now but I have had a couple of serious relationships. I’ve been single now for a couple of years and notice that many guys in their 20s ask me out. Actually I like this age group as I have now started travelling a lot and doing things I couldn’t do when I was younger due to study commitments. I have just made friends with a 25 year old guy & there is a two way attraction. He asked my age, I told him around 40, he couldn’t believe it and wants to date me saying that at least we can be friends. He told me age is a nothing to him, all that matters is how good a woman I am and the connection & he wants a mature woman. I am attracted to him but scared. What should I do? Can this really have a future? I am a serious person, not a ‘fling/one night’ at all. He is studying a very serious course and I like his intelligence.
Lukes Love Life answers:
I am a guy and will give you an honest answer. Yes, there are a lot of us that are attracted to an older woman if she looks amazing for her age. For some it’s even a fetish. Older women don’t play games and are honest and sincere. Another thing is we know women peak sexually at an older age and want it more so for a young guy that is in his peak…it works out great if you know what I mean…lol! The only thing is that it hardly ever lasts because of the age difference. What I mean is this… If you are around 20 yrs. Older than him, when he is 40 you’ll be around 60 and prob. Not attracted to you anymore. What I am saying is that it could be fine for a few years, but it’s prob. Just a sex thing with him and wouldn’t really want a relationship for a long period of time. I could be wrong, but with that big of a age difference I’m thinking he is just attracted to having an older woman. I don’t think you would have a long future with him like marriage or anything. I would be careful if I were you. That’s just my advice though…I know how guys operate….but it’s prob. Just a sexual thing more than a real relationship. Good luck though in whatever you decide to do.
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