Laura asks…
Christian teenage dating advice please… ( 
At my school’s homecoming dance I met this guy. He asked for my number and we started texting. This dance was exactly a month ago and I I have texted this certain guy for at least a little bit eveyrday. About a week ago he kinda asked me out. I refused(even though I like him), because at this point of my life I am struggling with my walk with God and I had come to a point where I was wanting to actually talk to God and read the Bible. Then also I needed to focus on school work and all. So that’s what I told this guy and he respeted me for my answer. We are just friends. However, I have been feeling lately that I have been craving a relationship with him. But, I know refusing going out with him was a good thing. But this craving is little out of control. I am not sure what to do. Any suggestions?
Few facts about situation:
I am 15 years old.
I have never dated any guy yet.
This guy is amazing, but I don’t need another thing in society distracting me from God.
Help? 
Thanks ya’ll!
Yes, he has grown up in a Christian home. However, I really don’t know his heart (only God does) so I am not completely sure what his walk with God is like.
Lukes Love Life answers:
Paul tells us in 1st Corinthians 25;28:
Now about virgins: I have no command from the Lord, but I give a judgment as one who by the Lord’s mercy is trustworthy. Because of the present crisis, I think that it is good for you to remain as you are. Are you married? Do not seek a divorce. Are you unmarried? Do not look for a wife. But if you do marry, you have not sinned; and if a virgin marries, she has not sinned. But those who marry will face many troubles in this life, and I want to spare you this.
The proto-orthodox position was to never marry unless absolutely necessary, as the end was too near. Keep in mind that Paul told his followers this nearly 2000 years ago, and the official position of at least the Catholic Church, but most Christian denominations as well, is that the end is too near to worry with something as trivial as marriage. If you want to get closer to God according to the Bible, stop doing anything remotely productive and wait for the end.
Ken asks…
Christian parents of a lesbian daughter … advice please?
My father and mother and both Christian, as am I and my sister. My sister has been having an affair with a married woman for the last 2 years and came out to my parents a few months ago. They (and I) are trying to be supportive and love her, along side not agreeing with her behaviour … not least of which because, whether it’s a gay relationship or not, it is an adulterous relationship and there are teenage children involved. They can never come out to most of their friends, her children, or anyone from their church as most are very strict evangelical (where, it would appear, forgiveness and love are not the main preaching!!!) and so there’s the additional fear of them having to live such a stressful secretive life. It’s just all one big mess, whether it’s straight, gay, or pink with purple spots – it’s just a flippin mess!!!!
Mess aside, do you know any books that may be helpful to my parents on how best to minister to my sister, how to support and guide people in homosexual relationships or, especially, any books written by Christian parents on how they have been able to cope with the knowledge they have a gay/lesbian child and how God has helped?
Buddy R – we’re on the same page hun, but by support I do not mean agree with – I mean support my sister though this situation, which everybody needs no matter what they’re going through.
Liz – thanks for actually answering my question. The majority of others haven’t!!
Everyone – I love my sister, so do my parents. It’s hard getting your head around something you don’t agree with and can see problems with. There’s loads of info out there on dealing with marriage break ups, affairs, etc, hency my question about info on Christian parents and gay children as there doesn’t seem to be much. I agree that the fact she’s gay isn’t the sole problems here and that acually you’re right, she’s been part of wrecking a home and goodnes knows what else. I’m in the middle of my parents and sister and they’re both looking to me for advice and support – I just wanted to get as much as possible from as many sources as possible.
Flower – THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU xxxx
Liz V – you’re a star, thank you too (and you’re dog’s REALLY cute!!!)
Lukes Love Life answers:
There is a spirit behind homosexuality. That’s where the problem lies.
The bible says:
“For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.” (Ephesians 6:12)
If I were you I would declare war on the enemy!
Come together with your parents and start a consecration fast. There are great books out there to teach you how to fast, and the spiritual results when you fast.
Come together in prayer. Seek the Lord. He knows exactly what to do. Find out how many days fast does He want you to do.
Fasting and prayer are a power couple. Where there is fasting and prayer, the chains are broken.
Stand in the gap for your sister through prayer and fasting as a family and break the demonic stronghold over your sister.
Love her in the meanwhile, but war against the enemy.
The Lord will honor your efforts to set your sister free and He will answer your prayers concerning her. He is a good God. He will step in for you and free your sister completely.
Not only that, He will restore your families and what the devil meant to destroy you, He will turn it around to bless you.
Just wait and see!
Heavenly Father,
I lift up this family in prayer. Lord, I pray that you will be with them in this time of need. Lord you see the enemy’s tactics to destroy this family and I pray that You would step in and thwart the enemy’s plans against them. I declare that they are the head and not the tail, above only and not beneath. I declare that whom the Son sets free is free indeed. Their sister shall be free by the redeeming power of the blood of Jesus.
Lord you died to set the captives free, so I thank You that you will show Yourself to be strong in this family so that You may be glorified.
For yours is the power and the honor and the glory forever and ever. In Jesus mighty name. Amen!
Be blessed
William asks…
Young floundering christian in need of older wiser christian advise?
i’m a christian teenager (15 and pentecostal). i’ve been a christian my whole life ,raised in church, but lately its all been a routine. i go to church, i come home from church. blah, blah, blah. i want to go deeper with my relationship with god, but for some reason it’s not working out. my youth pastor says that in order to start that hunger and need for more of god, i need to spend time with him everyday. i try, but reading the bible is just really boring and i can’t figure out how it applys to me. i’ve tried the little teenage devotional books, they don’t work either. praying is something i put off all day until i’m drifting off to sleep at night. i hate it. it’s like a want to be a stronger christian, but i just don’t want to put in the time and effort it takes to continue a relationship. any older christians with advice? thanks!!
Lukes Love Life answers:
An easier to understand version ( New Internation is good) AUDIO is pretty nice. Get the one with sound effects . It make listening more enjoyable
Join some Christian groups at church for outings, get involved with things that you enjoy
Sharon asks…
Question about a Christian friend?
I have a 30 year old friend who is almost certainly gay, but at the same time is a hugely religious born again Christian.
When he was a teen he had an obsession with taking off his clothes and parading himself naked around his male friends and trying to get them to join in. He grew out of that, but he still shows all the telltale signs: He has never had a girlfriend – in fact he doesn’t show any interest socially or sexually in women at all. He blanks them normally. He treats my partner as if she barely exists when we talk!
He continually surrounds himself with teenage/20 something boys both in and out of his church. You watch him smother them with interest an attention when you introduce them to him!
All his celebrity obsessions are with camp “luvvie” actors. He’s often a bit vain, being meticulous over his appearance and uses all manner of beauty products. However He’s also devoted to his mother and his family, and is in pretty much every way the perfect Christian in conduct and courtesy.
Being an atheist and his friend I have never really known what to do and have maintained a “it’s his life, let him deal with it” attitude. You get no clues as to how he feels talking to him. He totally avoids any subjects of sexuality or relationships. He would furiously reject the any suggestion he was gay without hesitation.
But I do feel very sorry for him and feel he is being repressed and prevented from being true to his feelings.
No one should have to feel that they must hide their sexuality like that. I know he could never deal with the consequences in his church which is why he acts the way he does. All his friends think the same as me, but none of us will say a word as we fear what might happen. His religion and relationship with god and Jesus is so important to him and I worry we’d just screw it all up if we tried to counsel him over it.
What do people here think? I’m likely to continue to let him do things his way but is there any advice, either from believers or non-believers? Is this the sort of situation where matters are best left alone?
Lukes Love Life answers:
The saddest part about your story is that he is convinced that he can’t love the Lord and be openly gay at the same time.
I am a gay Christian. I know many people who are gay Christians and it’s not that hard. You just need 2 things: a real understanding of what the Bible does and doesn’t say about gay people and a church that isn’t steeped in the lie that God rejects gay people.
For now, that church might be more important to him than his own needs for love and affection. If so, there isn’t much you can do.
But you can let him know that his friends don’t think being gay is evil and that you love him unconditionally.
Charles asks…
14 year old girl dating 16 year old guy?
I’m about to be a sophomore, and he’s about to be a junior, so there’s really not a big deal in the grades; since were both in high school. And I’m aware that teenage relationships don’t last forever, and I don’t want it to be really serious, I just want experience so when I’m a young adult. We both like each other, and it’s not about sex. We both go to the same church and we want to wait to have sex. He’s sixteen, but he doesn’t have a drivers license, so it’s not like he’d be driving me off somewhere against my will, or anything. Were both Christian, and we have morals, but would it be awkward for a two year age gap dating each other? My parents are really protective over me..and Southern..so I’m sure if my Dad ever meet him, their will be some hardcore gun cleaning in the works! I’ve never really had a boyfriend in my teen years. Only like, little secret “boyfriends” when I was little. And another thing is..he has a girlfriend..and they started dating a few days before we met, so it’s been about a month now, and he told me he likes me and that he’d like a relationship with me, but I’m a bit nervous on how it would work out. Because I feel that I can’t give him the attention that I should, but I will make an effort, and I’m really not sure how this would go with my parents..but there’s a five year age gap between them. They started dating each other at 17 and 22, so they really can’t be mad about the age. Would his friends make fun of him for dating someone younger? I really don’t look my age, I look around seventeen, because everyone says I’m identical to Miley Cyrus- sadly. Advice?
What would his friends say?
Lukes Love Life answers:
As far as the age gap is concerned, you should be fine. Your parents may be hesitant, but if they meet him and see he’s a great guy, they should be fine. I’m 16 and recently dated a 19 year old. So as long as the age doesn’t matter to the two of you it should not matter to anyone else! So his friends may give him crap, but don’t let that bother you!
What i would be concerned about is this girlfriend he has. You don’t want to come across as “that girl who broke them up”. So i would suggest you discuss his gf with him. As him how he can be dating her but asking for a relationship with you. That could be a sign of a guy who would cheat on you with another girl if he’s doing that now to his gf. But if he does break up with her for you, make sure people don’t know it was for you. Like wait awhile after the breakup before yall get together.
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